a scary thought for sox fans Uh oh. I just thought of something scary. The "curse" might be over. The Sox might actually win the Series. After 86 years. And that's great news to Sox fans, right? Hell, yeah, it's good news.

But it's bad news, too. Red Sox fans are a strange breed. We've become accustomed to failure. We expect disappointment. Our favorite phrases include "wait 'til next year." Unfortunate as it sounds, losing defines the Red Sox. Yes, I agree that changing your definition from "loser" to "winner" is a change for the better. But at least when they're losing, you know that a Red Sox fan is a true loyalist. We love our team unconditionally. Who else but a true fan could love a team like this? No matter that we have 86 years of history with no World Series trophy to show for it. The fact that we end every season vowing that next year will be the year is a true testament to the resilience and desire of this team. Championships? Negative. Perseverance? You betcha.

I'm afraid of what the 21st Century Red Sox fan is going to look like. There have been so many teams that have been great for some period of time. And every time one of them comes along, millions of people jump on the bandwagon. Then as soon as the team starts to not win championships these fans disappear. Case in point: Dallas Cowboys of the early to mid 1990's. This team couldn't lose. They were America's team. Everybody loved 'em. Why? Because Americans want to be associated with a winner. But only while they are winning. Where are all those Dallas Cowboys fans now? Most of them are wearing Patriots jerseys these days. I do not want to see this happen to the Red Sox. Maybe you should have to have some kind of membership card ("member since 1976"), or sign an affidavit that says "I, __(name)__, newly christened Boston Red Sox fan, do hereby promise to remain a fan through thick and thin. I promise to love the Red Sox even if they go another 86 years without a World Series Championship, and even if they lose to the Yankees next year and every year thereafter. Signed _____________" You may now enter Red Sox Nation. Welcome to the club.

I liken this phenomenon to the husbands of contestants on The Swan. The pre-Swan contestant has nothing going for her. She's ugly, depressed, wrinkled, and flabby (I know, this sounds harsh, but they're the ones who blab about it for an hour). But darn it, they have a loving husband standing by them every step of the way (at least some of them do). These guys don't care that their wife has stretch marks or a big nose. But then the pre-Swan goes through this radical transformation. Now they have large fake boobs, nice hair, big teeth, and every inch of skin has been stretched and tucked. Now they probably get noticed by regular guys walking down the street. Before they probably didn't. But who's the one that counts? The guy they go home to. Of course he probably likes the fact that she is more of a knockout than before. It's good that they are now a Swan, but hey, this guy loved her even before all that. He's a true fan. Guys now stare when she walks down the street, but in some way wasn't it better when you were the only one that noticed her, for her inner beauty? You saw something that the other guys didn't see or didn't understand.

I loved the Sox when they were the ugly duckling. I'll still love them as the swan. I welcome you to join the club, but please sign the affidavit first.
  ¶ monger187 wrote this on 10/27/2004